Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Memories

“ ‘Remember when...’ is the lowest form of conversation” Tony Soprano

It’s been almost a month since I have posted my last blog. Not for lack of effort; I have sat down five or six times and attempted to write a music blog. I have tried different styles: an analysis of the “Recently Added” playlist on my iPod as an insight to my soul; my love letter to Hip Hop; my confession of unlikely songs that I listen to (notable mentions were Cher’s “Gypsies, Tramps, and Thieves” and Tori Amos’ “Leather”); I even watched Almost Famous for inspiration. But lord help me, none of them were very good.

Meanwhile my sister has outperformed me by writing 5 blogs about such interesting topics as text message etiquette, hostile bread baking, her friend Katie, light-bulbs and ex’s, and her various phases (For those who read that blog, I would like to state for the record that I had a better name for her “angry female singer-songwriter phase” I called it the “Anorexic Hippie Chick Rock Phase”, and whether it was the Anorexic Fiona Apple or the Curvaceous Jewel, if it was chick rock it was lumped in the category).

Either way, I need to step my game up and write a blog.

Gabi suggested I use a childhood memory to spark inspiration. Which got me thinking about all of the memories I have created. These are the PG-13 edition of some of the best memories I’ve ever had.

There was the most I’ve ever tortured my sister; which was actually accidental. I was five years old, and we were on vacation in Lake Tahoe. In the middle of the night I had to pee really badly. I got up in the dark and tried to navigate through the first hotel room I’ve ever been in. After five minutes, my bladder began to win the battle, so I opened the first door I found and let it go. That door happened to not be the bathroom, but the closet containing my sister’s suitcase. The rest of the trip was less than pleasant for her.


There was my first bad experience with alcohol. I went to my friend Myk’s house on a saturday night when I was 16 years old. Myk’s mom Kathy was out; not out of town, simply out. Myk, Adam, Eli and I deemed this to be the perfect opportunity to consume a handle of Ancient Age whiskey along with the pizza that Kathy bought us. Around 10:30 Kathy returned to us playing Madden 2001 and trying to act sober, which we pulled off until the alcohol kicked in for me. I was on the top bunk about to throw up and I couldn’t find anywhere to let it go, so I let it go on the first place I could find (I’m sensing a theme here)...on Eli’s Head. However, being the clever boys we are, we were able to convince Kathy that we hadn’t been drinking, that I was lactose intolerant and had a bad reaction to eating too much pizza. Whenever I went to Myk’s house from then on, Kathy warned me not to overeat every time we got pizza.

Trying to find a moment alone with Shan during a party at Oceana's house, only to have my friend Mike walk in, laugh, and announce to the party loudly “Jeremy’s getting his ***** S*****!!!!!!”.

The Friday Morning Club and sending my mom the infamous text.

Chasing Adam around Oceana’s house yelling “I got it in my holster!” only until Jolinda saw us and said “You better put it back!”

An interesting breath holding contest in Myk’s hot tub.

LP3...If you want to know what that is, ask me, it's not fit for print.

Shan’s parents finding out we were having sex, and taking me out to Applebee’s and surprising me by saying, “We think you’re too young, but don’t worry we’ll raise the baby while you are at college.”

Breaking up with Shan a week later.

Going to Orientation for college, and my mom picking me up on DP while disposing of a bowl of my own vomit.

Discovering how easy girls at UCSB are with the douchiest line I’ve ever uttered: “Hey baby do you want to bake a pie for me?” Response: “Ohhhh my god! I am such a good cook!”

Moving in with a skinny, long-haired kid from the Valley named Aaron Schiff.

Irish Girls.

Tijiuana with the Rugby Team.

Rosarito with the Rugby Team.

Tijuana with Ese and Josh.

Rosarito with the Frat.

Ese begging me to go with him to the Neverland Ranch following the Michael Jackson verdict.

Votto the Pizza thief: "Do I even know YOU?"

One word: Cowden.

Keefer’s 21st birthday. And the subsequent drunken, all-male shirtless dance party that resulted.

Working at Michael Jordan’s Flight School, and how it changed my life.

Graduating College, yet having one last gasp by living in the frat house with all of the freshman.


While working for a touchy-feely non-profit in college, I was praised by my boss Jordan for my ability to create memories. I didn’t fully grasp it at the time, but looking back I have had some incredible memories with my friends. The Tony Soprano quote is the sentiment of a man who is coming to grips with the fact that he has peaked. Well to quote Dennis Reynolds “I haven’t even begun to peak”. Maybe I’ll feel different when I get that age, but for now I am going to look back fondly at all my memories, and use them as inspiration, along with my friends, and usually some Patron shots, to create new and better ones.

1 comment:

GLM said...

Skiiing is no fun when your jumpsuit smells like urine.

Another brilliant blog! Nice work bro!